coffee and kismet

so i decided to write in my paper journal all of a sudden this morning. it's a mammoth book that has been carried around with me since june 1998. i refuse to start another book until this one is filled, and so today i decided i would finish it. so i went to starbucks, got my coffee, and became one of those pretentious bastards you see writing at starbucks. so, i wrote about 8 pages, and then i started looking back through some earlier posts. it's amazing how long ago 1998 was in my life. how many relationships it encompasses. how many questions, and heartaches, and movies, and plays, and tears have happened since i first wrote in this very book.

but what strikes me as noteworthy is that this volume of my life starts with kara komlen. and it is going to end with darci bryan. two women who i think of very similarly. i think they are similar in personality, and almost every facet except for maybe where they went to high school. but most importantly, as far as i'm concerned, is how i feel or felt about them when they were in my life. the attraction. the tractor beam. the feeling of something more lying just beyond our reach. it's interesting. the start and end of a book. full circle.

one hundred and fifty percent of you
i hold each breath i take with you
i pray for you please think of me